it's alright because i like the way it hurts [JAY]

[mallory]

It had been a long night. At least, to Harley it had been. She felt exhausted. She just wanted to snuggle up next to her puddin' and fall asleep on his chest, slowly slipping into dream land. Ah. Wouldn't that be perfect. Hah, if that ever happened, Harley would even question The Joker's actions. She'd take them willingly though. Any sign of affection from him is good. An elongated sigh came from her tiny body as she walked the back roads home. She was too tired to flip and frolic and be sneaky. Harley just wanted to get home, collapse onto her bed, and sleep until Tuesday. Turning down an alley, she tried to think of anything she had to do before she went to sleep. Feed the babies? No, she fed them before she went out. Leave a note for Mistah J? Naw, he was probably already home at his desk planning this and that for The B-Man's downfall. Talk to Red? Well, there was no way she could. Harley didn't have a phone, and if she did The Joker would be on control of it. And since he hated Red more than he hated Harley, she could never talk to her unless they were working together or Harley got kicked out and went to visit. It looked like she could just ease on into bed when she got home.

Or so she thought. When she crept in the front door, The Joker was where she thought he would be; hunched over piles of papers with one flickering light on. Harley waved to him sweetly, but he didn't look up for a second. Exhaling sharply, she moved into her room and took off her jumpsuit and head piece, slipping into one of her night gowns and letting her blonde hair fall like it naturally does (which was rare for Harls). She thought of trying to act all sexy and persuade her puddin' into bed, but last time she tried that her butt landed on the pavement outside. So, maybe tonight was just a 'I missed you today, I hope you had a good time, I'll see ya tomorrow' kind of night. Yeah. She had to say something to him. If she didn't, she wouldn't have felt right on the inside. Petting Lou on the head as she passed him by, Harley crept behind the Joker and peered at the sheets he was looking at, trying to make sense of them. Of course, they were all plans to kill Batman. And although he always had these elaborate schemes and intricate plots, they never ended up working. Harley had some good ideas of her own, but whenever she voiced her opinion, Mistah J would tell her to quiet down and let the big boys handle it. Made her feel kinda stupid.

She breathed softly on his neck, reading all the scribbles on the piece of paper he was holding up. "This looks like a good idea puddin'. Thinkin' of tryin' it out soon?" She backed away a bit when he turned around. She gave a small smile and made herself a little spot to sit on his desk, brushing some things away. Hoisting herself up, she settled in and continued to read the plan he had just made. "I think this one will work fa sure! The B-Man's gonna get it this time right puddin'?" She widened her smile to give him a full on, hope filled grin. She wanted him to know that he had her support one hundred percent. After all, if he didn't know that she was supportive, he would assume that she didn't care whether he eliminated the Batman or not. And that is just not true at all. If Joker cared, Harley cared. Case closed.

[Yvette]

....No.

Nada.

Nein.

Non.

He'd crumpled more papers tonight than ever before. Why couldn't things just happen? Why did he have to think? Thinking was annoying, thinking was time-consuming, thinking was--thinking was what separated him from all those other fourth-rate costumed guys prancing around his town. Joker crumpled up another one, his jaw closed tight, to the point were his teeth hurt a little. He pitied the finger that dared to be caught between his teeth, because it wouldn't be caught long. He'd snap through that finger like it was----An idea came to him and he began to scribble. Here a plan title, there a sketch, upside-down on the paper, some materials... And in the center, a poorly-drawn Batman, with x-es on that caped cowl of his. Giant chattering teeth. A conveyor belt. Yes, this could work!

He held up the paper to the light, his eyes absorbing it as though it were a work of art, his pencil doodle of the deathtrap. A pause, and he pulled open a drawer of his desk and pulled out a crayon, coloring in the teeth and Batman, rather sloppily. He was in a hurry, he had no time to color inside the misshapen lines! Slamming the crayon back onto his desk (and breaking it in the process) he held up the drawing again. And that was when he heard her.

Felt her, too.

Joker cringed a little as her breath hit his neck, refusing to admit, even to himself, that it tickled a little. He turned back to her slowly, his eyes still dancing from excitement of the plan, and he turned back to the paper. He wished she wouldn't read over his shoulder....

Poof.

Two wishes left.

She moved to sit on his desk, and his face fell as she re-located things. Joker heard the crayon hit the floor and looked down, pausing.

"Do you know what that is?" He asked quietly, unnaware that he had caused this. Joker didn't wait for her answer, although his voice had no emotion, "That's my crayon. Harley, you just broke my red crayon."

[mallory]

Harley wasn't totally shocked that he wasn't happy to see her. Though, she can admit that she was surprised with how calm he was acting. She was use to much, much worse. Maybe tonight would a good night after all. She smiled at him for a moment, not even listening to what he was saying. "Do you know what that is Harley?" Those words didn't even find their way to her ears as she kicked her feet, left then right, as they hung off the edge of the desk. Clearly, she didn't have to do anything though, because he was answering for her. "That's my crayon. Harley, you just broke my red crayon." She shook her head a moment, lifting herself up to pick the dented crayon from underneath her bottom. It was split in two pieces, uneven ones too. She made a slanted face, biting down on her lip just a bit. "Well, I mean-" She started, tossing the end part across the room. She held the part with the tip out towards him. "You can still use this part! It's just like new!" Her smile was bigger than before. Silly Joker. You can still use a broken crayon! You just gotta use the right side. How come he didn't know that!

And besides, Harley knew he had tons of extra packs of crayons in one of his drawers. She hopped off the desk, placing the broken crayon in front of him, and started rummaging through the top drawer. Nothing inside that one but crumpled up papers and some decks of playing cared. Moving onto the second drawer, Harley found some half full crayon boxes, but the reds were missing or broken as well. Jeez, how many times can you use a red crayon and break it? She shrugged, closing up that drawer and moving to the one right in front of him. Pulling it open, she made sure not to hit him in the stomach as it came out of the desk. To the left side, hidden under some papers, was a brand new box of Crayola Crayons, waiting to be used. "Ya see puddin'! All ya gotta do is look a bit!" She held up the box triumphantly, ripping the top off and digging through for the red one and, when she found it, whipping it out of the box and holding it out for him to take. "See how helpful I can be sometimes? You should ask me fa help more often!" She giggled and resumed her spot on the desk, crossing her ankles politely. "So, what's this plan about?"

[Yvette]

His eyes followed the crayon across the room as though she'd just launched a friend of his from a cannon. It clattered sadly to the ground, rolling further away. She was lucky it hadn't knocked anything over. Joker sighed, partially for loss of the crayon, and partially in annoyance. He was perfectly aware that he could use the other half, but that was the smaller of the two halves, and therefore more difficult to color with. When scribbling death plans in a hurry, it was easier to hold onto a full crayon.

She knew this.

He scanned over the plans as she searched for a new crayon, but once again clenched his jaw. Really? She could have asked him to move a bit, but there she went, looking through the drawer he was right in front of. If only to make things more difficult for her, he hunched over, using his pencil to add some blackish-grey to the cowl. She still managed to not hit him with her hand or the drawer, and Joker had to give her credit for that.

To his surprise, she found a new package of crayons, and within moments, there was a new red one in front of his face. Joker blinked, before allowing a small grin and snatching it roughly from her, colouring in the gums of the chattering teeth. "I didn't ask you for help," he muttered as he coloured, although the smile still remained. He was happy with the plan, more than anything else, although he appreciated the new crayon.

Then again, why should he thank her for the new one? It was the least she could do after breaking it in the first place.

He bit his lip rather obviously and tucked the crayon behind his ear for safekeeping, "Really, Harley," he didn't look up at her, merely tilted his head to look at the paper from another angle, because turning the paper, itself didn't actually occur to him, "What do you think it's about?" He spoke as though it were obvious, which, considering the crayon Batman and the rest of the picture, it was.

[mallory]

He grinned! He actually grinned! Harley made her puddin' smile! She knew that showing him she cared would make him reconsider the things he's done to her in the past. She giggled as he used the new crayon she just got for him. "I didn't ask you for help." She tilted her head a bit. Well, maybe he didn't directly ask her for help. But isn't helping out when someone doesn't ask better? She thought so. "Well that's tha point! I got you a whole new crayon without you even havin' ta ask me or go through the hassle of doin' it yaself! I'm gettin' ta be pretty useful around here." She nodded to herself, bringing her legs up onto the desk and crossing them Indian style. Leaning over a bit, she looked over the now colorful plan. To be honest, she didn't quite understand it at first. It was too much happening on one piece of paper. However, for The Joker she'd try to understand and maybe even help him pull the plan off!

Clearing her throat, she moved her hand a bit to get closer to the paper. She felt her fingers brush up against something, but it was probably nothing. "Well, I see a buncha clatterin' teeth and the B-Man in the middle of 'em. Ya gonna lowah him inta ya teeth?" Her poorly formed plan idea was interrupted by a warm sensation on her hand. Curiously she looked over and saw a brown liquid forming around her fingers, and slowly creeping it's way across the piece of paper her puddin' had worked so hard on. Harley quickly hopped off the desk to see that when she moved her hand, she knocked over a small cup of coffee. And now, instead of being in the mug, it was all over The Joker's new plan.

Okay Harls, think quickly. What could get rid of a coffee stain? Some of that bleach stuff maybe? Yeah. Something like that is sure to get the stain out of his perfect new plan! "No worries Mistah J! I got this covered!" Quickly, she sprinted into their kitchen area, grabbing some Oxi-Clean and a couple of paper towels. On her way back, she made sure not to wake up the babies, after all it was hard to get them back to sleep once they wake up. She tip-toed over to the desk, where a very displeased Joker was hunched over his now foiled plans, staring in disbelief. Triumphantly, she held out the bottle and the towels, giving him a reassuring smile. "Ta-da! This'll make it all bettah Mistah J!"

[Yvette]

Joker slumped his head and shoulders onto the desk, blocking out the world for a moment. Useful. Right. For a moment, he wondered where she'd been, just a while before now. Surely not being useful.

He sat up and took a controlled breath, glancing up at her and removing the pencil from behind his ear. He tapped it against the table, silent for a momen. Joker leaned back in his chair and flopped his free arm around the back of it and stared at her where she sat atop the desk. "Yes, Harls." He said slowly, annoyance only hinting in his voice despite the fact that the smile was gone, "I'm going to lower him into my teeth."

Something was on his hand. Something /warm/ was on his hand, and making it harder for him to tap the pencil on the desk. He looked back, and felt his jaw drop, red lips parted in horror.

No! NO, NO, NO!

Joker tried to speak but it came out similar to a squeak. His plan! And he'd been so convinced that this one would work... He tried brushing the liquid off the paper, but it was too late, the damage was done, and it just flowed back, anyway. "I got this covered." Yes, yes she did. Very well-covered, actualy. Covered with hazelnut creamer and coffee.

When she returned, he broke his gaze of shock and looked up at her. Oxi-clean? Joker slammed his hand onto the desk and stood, sending a spash of coffee into the air and onto both their outfits. "You can't use that on paper!" he hissed, his eyes narrowing dangerously and his hand clenching into a fist on the table.

Clench, unclench. Clench, unclench. His jaw seemed to follow the pattern, too.

[mallory]

She pulled away as he slammed his fist onto the table. The coffee had gotten on her outfit and his. She looked down at the Oxi-Clean, reading the instructions carefully. Hmph. So it did work for clothes only. Well it's the effort that counts right? She was just trying to bring his plan back to life! And plus, his memory is pretty good. Can't he just re-sketch it on a new piece of paper? With a crooked smile, she pushed all the wet papers off the desk and onto the floor, ripping off some paper towels and wiping the desk off. That was the first thing that needed to be cleaned. Once the desk area was dry, she picked up the other wet pieces of paper and threw them out. They were useless now right? She kept the one with his plan on it and hung it up, letting it air dry so that after he could re-create it and use that as a reference. Maybe the second one would be even better than the first one!

Quickly, she put the Oxi-Clean back (stupid thing) and rushed back to her puddin'. Her body was shaking a bit; now she was getting nervous. Maybe she should've just gone to bed without saying anything to him. Now she put herself in danger. With a deep breath, she stepped forward, putting a hand on his chest, "I'm - I'm sorry puddin'. I didn't mean ta knock the coffee ovah. I didn't even see it on tha table! But, uh, you can remake ya plan! Yeah! And it'll be even bettah this time! And if you want, I'll help ya! It's the least I can do - I mean I did ruin it." She gave him a look of ' I'm sorry ' and ' please don't kill me '. To anyone else, it would've been a cute gesture to say I'm sorry. But to the Joker, it could be a variety of things. She was hoping for a more calm sort of angry instead of what she usually got. Maybe things would turn out in her favor this time?

[Yvette]

Joker stared at her as she cleaned up the desk. She'd better do that, yes. His anger could wait until there was no more coffee on his desk.

Precious, precious wasted coffee...

These nights of scheming were starting to get to him, and he took the loss of his coffee harder than the loss of his crayon.... Unfortunately, he took the loss of the drawing even harder than that. He could re-do it, yes. He could remember the idea. But he shouldn't /need/ to remember. There should have been no reason that the Joker had to remember his plans. They should have been in front of him, on paper, coloured in all pretty.

When she put her hand on his chest, that pushed him that little bit farther to the edge. He forced a smile and took her hand in his, holding it in place "Harley, darling?" he said, much sweeter than he felt. He wanted her hopeful. He wanted her to stop having that frightened look he could see, and knew well. Joker tilted his head and his eyes creased up in a warm smile.

[mallory]

Harley tingled at the feel of his hand on hers. If only he'd do that more often... She really did love him. No matter what he could possible do to her. He really wasn't that bad. He certainly wasn't as bad as everyone says he is. He's just misunderstood. And Harley became who she is today to understand him more. With all the things he went through growing up to what Batman puts him to on a daily basis, Mistah J needs someone around to make him feel special and make him feel loved. Those years ago, she thought he was nothing more than a tell-all book waiting to happen. Now, now she appreciates him for things that everyone loathes him for. He always has a joke, he's always smiling, and he's completely devoted to his work, and his little Harls. Swooning a bit, she felt herself stumble. But, quickly, she pulled it together and looked back at his face, a perfect vision of pure genius.

She giggled a bit, pulling herself closer to him. If he showed signs of intimacy, she would certainly respond. How often did this happen right? She placed her other hand on his shoulder, creeping it up slowly towards his neck. "Yes, puddin'?" She cooed sweetly. Maybe talking to him wasn't a mistake! Well, talking to The Joker was never a mistake for her. Just a bonus to seeing him everyday. She moved a bit closer to him, leaning her head against his arm, trying to make herself seem adorable and innocent. Sometimes he went for that sort of thing.

[Yvette]

"Harley, it's so... Wonderful of you to offer your help, my dear!" He said, forcing the pleased tone of voice and the grin. He gently rubbed her hand with his thumb. Joker would allow her a few more moments of false security. He laughed and looked down at her, his smile still warm.

And then he began to tighten his grip on her hand.

Tighter, until he was sure that it was starting to hurt, and he was /certain/ she couldn't pull away. He watched her reaction, his grin turning to the same sort he had on when he watched one of his victims. But at least it was an honest grin. Harley would appreciate that, right? His eyes flashing with anger, he still spoke in the same, forced chipper voice, "You've helped quite enough."

He tightened just a bit more. This was so simple this time, she'd been right there. He didn't have to run after her, or try to get ahold of her hair... She'd given her hand right to him. Why wouldn't Harley ever learn? She would be wonderful if she would just learn! He didn't want to be interrupted while he worked, he didn't want her spilling coffee on his brand-new plans... And even if she replaced the crayons, she shouldn't have broken them in the first place.

[mallory]

Harley giggled as he praised her. It was wonderful of her to help him! He didn't need to do everything on his own, and Harley never figured out why he intended on doing things that way! She was there for a reason; to make his life easier. She was his sidekick, his go-to gal. And now that he started realizing that, Harley thought their dream life could start. His hand remained on hers, his thumb gently caressing it. "It's the least I can do puddin'!" She replied smiling. But slowly, her smile began to falter. His grip on her hand tightened, which at first Harley took as him being more caring. But, when it started to hurt, she whimpered a bit. And when it started to hurt more, a confused frown lay upon her face as she looked up at him. Why was he hurting her? She thought things were going so well! She tried to tug away, but his grip was too strong on her hand. "You've helped quite enough." She nodded, still confused, trying to pull her hand away.

But the most she struggled, the harder he held onto her. It didn't seem like he had that much muscle. But when you're a 5'4" girl up against a 6 foot guy, you automatically lose the fight. "Puddin'...", she started, her voice shaking a bit, "You can let go now. I undastand okay?" He still didn't let go, his twisted grin still on his face. "M-m-mistah J. Please, y-you can let go of my hand." Once again, no response, just a harder grip on her poor hand. She tugged harder this time, making The Joker lean forward a bit, but he still remained in charge of her hand. She whimpered a bit louder this time, her eyes becoming a bit watery. "PLEASE PUDDIN'! JUST LET GO!" His smile fell. She raised her voice. Oh god. This is where things start getting ugly. Harley knew she was never supposed to raise her voice to him like that. But he was /hurting/ her! She had to do something to make him see that! She lowered her head quickly, trying not to look at his face. "I'm sorry, Mistah J." Her voice was low and shaky, and barely loud enough for him to hear her muffled apology.

[Yvette]

"Harley," he said sternly, trying to get her to stop. Joker began putting his nails into the squeeze. His knuckles would have turned white with the grip, were they not already bleached with acid. This stupid woman. He was sick of trying to explain, he was sick of her apologies. He was really sick of Bud and Lou, actually, she needed to wash them. But he wouldn't let himself be distracted with the smell. He turned his glare back to her, the malicious smile still dominating his face. It fell when she shouted.

Convinced he could hold her hand no tighter, he was content to move onto something else. After all, she had yelled at him. She had no right. He created her. Without him, she'd still be Harleen. The would-be, who had to sleep with teachers to get by. But she was Harley Quinn now! Why couldn't she see everything he'd done for her?! Hell, it should have been enough that he allowed her to stay in the same building with him! His fury made him over-think the situation (and be sure that none of the blame could be pointed his direction. He was just punishing. She'd broken the rules.)

Joker let go of her hand. Almost as quickly as he had done so, he back handed her, his glove breaking the sound of the smack into something a bit more muffled, but certianly just as hard. "You're always sorry," he accused in a hiss.

[mallory]

She knew that yelling was a bad idea. She knew that screaming out like that would cost her something. But, Harley had to do something. He was hurting her! Really badly too. His nails were digging into her poor, fragile hand. The grip got tighter and tighter to more she struggled. So when he finally let go, she released a sigh of relief. Quickly, she pulled her hand to her body, rubbing it a bit, trying to ease the pain away. But before she could even say anything to him, her face met his hand. She spun around, quick to land on the floor, her pain free hand now rubbing the side of her face. Tears began to form in her eyes; her throat was closing up. It was happening. Just like that. The vicious cycle of them fighting, her getting hit, and him kicking her out was happening all over again right before her very eyes? And the worst part? It was her fault. It was always Harley's fault. If she could just keep her mouth shut long enough so that The Joker didn't get mad at her all the time, she wouldn't have to go through this same routine every week. It was beginning to take a toll on her body.

She decided to remain on the floor for a minute, whimpering as she rubbing her now red cheek, trying to ease the pain. "B-b-but puddin'...I really am s-sorry this time..." Her voice was even lower than before, and it was harder for her to form sentences with the giant lump that was forming in her throat. Using his desk as a prop, she lifted herself off the ground, bringing her squeezed to death hand back to her body. Some tears started to roll down her cheeks, but she tried to hold them back. Letting him see her cry would push him off the deep end. He'd probably laugh, tell her to quit being a baby and send her on her way. She wiped away any sign of wetness on her face before approaching him again, making sure she was a safe enough distance away so that he couldn't hit her. "I'm sorry I yelled. I shouldn't have. It wasn't in my place ta shout like that. And I'm sorry for what happened with ya plans and ya desk. I tried ta help ya as best as I could." She lowered her head and shuffled by him, attempting to sneak into bed before he had the option of sending her on the streets. Maybe he would take her pathetic apology and find it comical enough for her to stay there.

[Yvette]

He watched lazily as she scrambled about the floor and finally stood up again. Any sign of a good mood had vanished from his face and mind. These things happened often in the Ha-Hacienda. So why was he this mad, this time? Joker listened to her pathetic apologies. Normally, he would have let it slide, just this once, because he'd just figured out a wonderful plan.

But he wasn't feeling normal tonight.

"Where do you think you're going?" Joker hissed, catching the top of her arm as she began to walk away from the situation. He wasn't holding it tight, but it had been enough to stop her walking. His lip sneered up as he waited for an answer. He was not a happy clown. Something in the back of his mind was bothering him. Something about kicking her out, and her crawling back everytime. It irked him somehow. Maybe... No, no.

He took a deep breath and let go of her, figuring she wouldn't dare walk off again, since he'd just practically scolded her for it the first time.

[mallory]

Harley's body shivered as he grabbed her arm again. Walking away was probably a bad idea as well. At this point in the evening, she just felt useless. Abused, stupid, and totally useless. The Joker didn't need her help; he didn't need anyone's help. Even though he created her and invited her to be his side kick, she annoyed him more than she helped him. In fact, she rarely helped him at all. She was too blinded by her feelings for him to actually be useful sometimes. Oh, if only she didn't love him so much. If only she had some sanity left in her. Or at least enough sanity to make her see when she was doing things that were wrong and when she was actually being a helpful little Harley Quinn. No wonder all the other villains (except Red of course) made fun of her. She was just one big joke wasn't she. She was nothing. Sh had nothing. She was hopelessly in love with a man who abused her and kicked her while she was down. She gave up her dream life because of the same man. And now she's on the verge of getting kicked out, again, because she doesn't know when enough is enough. Harley, when will you learn?

Before she said anything, The Joker let go of her arm, figuring she wouldn't do anything else that would displease him. And it would've been smarter if Harley didn't do anything. If she had just collapsed on the floor and fell asleep right there, letting him monitor her every move, she would've had a home that evening. But at this point, Harley was too upset and distraught to be thinking like that. She wanted him to realize how sorry she truly was. She wanted him to recognize that she was wrong, and she knew that, and she would never (pfft) do it again. But he wouldn't, no matter how many times she would utter a pathetic 'I'm sorry' his way. "I'm going ta sleep Mistah J. In the bed. I'm tired..." she muttered as she continued to walk away. She wanted to curl up with her babies and sleep for days. That way, she would be dreaming of her perfect world, where The Joker showed that he loved her as much as she loved him, and they would finally live the life she imagined when they first met.